Sunday, July 19, 2009

Accepting Expecting

There are so many times when I've heard so many people say that one shouldn't expect anything out of anyone.Forget anyone , one should expect nothing out of their most loved & closed ones. But I always wonder how can it work that way '?? I can guarantee that all these people just make an attempt at sounding strong..but there can be no way you can reach a state where you expect 'NOTHING from people close to you.

Maybe Its one of the ways to save oneself from getting hurt. But how will life move on without looking up to someone ? Isn't it natural to expect ??? And pretty much Justified. Why would someone expect anything out from a stranger ?

No genuine relationship can ever shrink on the basis of expectations unfulfilled. I mean give a break! We all have mood swings. We all have our own desires.And we all are selfish. So what if once in a blue moon we or someone else do not do things as are assumed ? It will utmost hurt .So many things hurt in life.We all are used to being hurt in some or other form.Whats the big deal anyway ?

Everything in life needn't have hard & fast Rules. Flexibility is so important.

I expect.I bloody expect a lot. And am not crushed to death when I'm disappointed.
I understand everybody has problems in their lives & they cannot always behave the way I want them to. Give 'em the freedom .Don't shoot.
Although the expectations and non-expected events or words depends on time & situation..generally there is no need at all to frown over it.People can be different , they can be indifferent. Keep the options open.Yes , if someones deceiving , then the situation differs but otherwise I accept that I expect.

Now onto friendships & being mean.I call most of my close friends mean out of fun.But on a serious note ..I wonder why people do not realize that Friends are never mean & if someone is mean ..why is that person a friends in the first place ?? What are friends ? People you have fun with ? People you can confide upon ? People with whom there is an unspoken pact that they will be there for you each & every time ? Then how much does it matter how many times that friend of yours ask you for a favor ? And why not ? Friends have the RIGHT to demand anything from you.Because again here , they expect ;)
I've felt a lot of times that my 'friends' came to me just when they needed me.Now when I look back , they were at my call just when I needed them too. But I also know..some of 'em are not my 'friends'. Those are just the ppl I KNOW. People I may have talked a few times with.Shared something.But not friends.

Not that with keeping expectations from others & others with me ..I can always promise to help.But I won't cheat.I may lie if I feel something is not right or my excuses aren't worth , but it will all be for the good in the end ; that keeping in mind that I'm easily envious of people around me.Of my bestest friends. I may have even bitched bout them which I still am not guilty about. It was a part of my mood swing.And its like every year , my friends must grant me 5 mood swings for free where I can go about the unexpected.If there are more , they must penalize me.I won't mind.

Most things in life are actually Simple.Clean.Clear.Calm
They just look complicated.
July to me seems the month of self realized philosophies.


  1. Oops!

    Well, I can say is that we cannot expect to not expect from our near ones..! This is what human tendency actually is..
    obv we are hurt when things don't go our way and someone we trust does something which is unexpected....

    That what makes us humans! isn't it?

  2. Yeah..V all hate to expect but v eventually do expect..

    I keep telling myself- Don't expect anything from I can't stop expecting myself

    Killer title :)

    July to me seems the month of self realized philosophies.. LOL

  3. I expect a lot from myself, and 50 % of the times i am disappointed.

    I expect a lil from my family members and 95 % of the times i am satisfied.

    I expect a lot from my frnds ..and they generally don't disappoint me and when they do, I shout at them, they shot back and we end up having normal stuff :)

  4. philosophies..?? I'd say 'fact'.. yeah.. I agree.. you can never 'not expect' from a closed one..

    On the flipside, I feel.. it's wrong if you take anyone for granted.. that is what creates a problem at a later stage.. otherwise expecting is almost as natural as anything..

    and yeah.. your July Posts seem to be quite insightful.. and philosophical too.. :)

  5. hey sugar,

    thats the first post of urs I read!
    followed ur blog last night!
    well... first para was something that was straight and known!
    you said u expect a lot, and still manage to be reasonable enough for things as to why sometimes people fail in fulfilling them and they too have their lives!
    well mostly a times when someone says this statement of "not expecting" then the basis of that is a deception, a betrayal of trust and its just momentarily advice, what one means mostly is not to expect or trust someone blindly!

    as far as friendship is concerned and being mean in friendship and all...
    yes friends do have a right to ask favors but when one says "friends have been mean", this means that one is being used from a single give and give and no take kind of friendship where when one work or favor is over then after a year one realises of a misjudgement of considering someone a friend!

    nicely written!
    straight and honest!
    tc god bless!

  6. ur right. if we are breathing, we r expecting. Its human to expect.

    Having said that, I like to keep my Expectations low. In the past, I hv gone overboard with em, and hv been hurt. Now I do hv some expectations from my near and the dear ones, but Im not gonna live by them. If those expectations are not met, I know I will still be alright. Cos there r times I fail too and dun meet someone else's expectations.

    **Most things in life are actually Simple.Clean.Clear.Calm
    They just look complicated.

    very well-said there!


  7. Though my mind expects something from friends,I dont approve it.I expect my friends to help me in distress,but I never said this to them.I expect my friends to give me birthday gift(and i didnt got it till now :P ) but I dont show it outside.

    You're blog is taking a jump into the deeper shelves of mind,it seems!
    Keep going!


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