Monday, August 1, 2011

The story of a Marwadi.

 Part I :
Guests

More guests
And even more guests!

Brownie points :
Special food cooked at home.
Home would never look so neat & perfect in every possible way.
First class.

Turn offs :
Thrown out of your own bedroom to accommodate them.
The talks about what you do.
The impossible- to- miss-stares after you tell them what you do.
The calculation their heads are doing to define the appropriate time for marriage (of course for you) - which is anything less than half of what you might have planned for yourself.
Self-praise. Too much.

PART II :
 Cultural Laxman Rekha 

Thesis :
No night stays @ friend's place.
No partying.
Guys not allowed to enter home.
Talking on phone with guys restricted or nil in some cases.
Books are friends. Why hang out ?! :-|
Issue :  Virginity , I assume ! :P

Brownie points : seriously ?? None what so ever.
Note : Most cases of eloping are a result of ones daring to cross this Laxman Rekha.
Most cases of guys getting spoiled too would fall in this area.
The more you restrict - the more boundaries crossed.

PART III
Marriages

Love marriage is an alien territory.
Typically the vices for our folks are :
Smoking. Drinking. Eating non veg.
And the fourth is - Love marriage!

The tedious ridiculous process in history of marriages : Arranged marriages!!
Check each other out. Read bio data. Interests and other such things.( Most of which are written just for the heck of it  :P )
One hour of rendezvous.
Few days time for approval--- without going out on date or contacting each other!!
WTF !!


PART IV
 Weddings
 Turns offs :
Read Part I  +  pretense  in every whichever way , in every whichever section.

Brownie points :
Get-togethers. Time off with cousins.
 The various functions which don't make much sense :P but fun to be a part of.

PART V
Miser ??

Stereotypes are stereotypes.
Definite believer in  : If you have it , flaunt it.
Reference : Diamond obsession . 
Reason : Competition :D

Baring apart few , most of the rich ones  live luxurious life et all. But they're misers in some areas.
Indulgent lifestyle.

PART VI
Family

 Joint families > Quarrels > Partition > Nuclear families.
a. Nuclear forever.
b. Nuclear yet bond with extended family.
c. Nuclear , bond with extended family , relatives , society..etc etc :O

Joint families ? - Extinct species. Fun. Pros & cons.


PART VII
Religious Values

Don't question. 
Just follow. 
Believe.
(  Personally I have no issues :P )

PART VIII
Passion

Business is in the blood.
Money. 
Stock market.

-----

Overall ..business families. Highly conservative. Typical Ekta Kapoor serials in some cases !
They want girls to get best education. But to not work after settling down into another family. ( ???! )
Baring apart the unnecessary illogical immature social and cultural rules our folks have  : Marwadis are nice people :P 

I always warn my friends not to fall for marus. Life after marriage in marwadi family is kinda difficult :P

21 comments:

  1. I'm an atypical madu jain. I drink, smoke, eat everything that moves on land (no sea-food) and don't believe in god.
    Only typical madu thing about me is the fact that I'm cheap :D

    ReplyDelete
  2. Interesting insights indeed. Esp the Laxman rekha ones.

    ReplyDelete
  3. lol..this was fun to read despite the fact that I don't know anything about Marwadis...i guess now i do. :D

    ReplyDelete
  4. haha :D this one was one observant write-up. Loved it :D
    A light read was exactly what I needed and love marriage is an alien territory for me too :(

    ReplyDelete
  5. I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. What a lovely insight into the life of a madus! :) We all talk so much about them, but we miss out on many facts, brilliantly put forth!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ha ha...loved the way u hav written the post. Very interesting read.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hahahhah awesome post Sugar..
    Although I am not a Maru, I've found the 'miser' characteristic in many a marwaris that I have encountered..

    It was a fun read - thanks for sharing! :D

    ReplyDelete
  8. THIS IS BRILLIANCE! KUDOS!

    Haha. Seriously. Your experience in and out has come out in a very funny way!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hey!!!
    I loved d way it is written!!!
    awesomely creative...
    All the Parts deserve a party!!!
    U r doing good...dolL
    Keep the Blog on roll!!

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am a fellow Maru woman. Crossed the Laxman Rekha many times- 1. When I first went to work my cousin said -"I feel sorry for you" 2. Love marriage - My uncle said " Now how will the rest of your cousins get married? 3. Eat non-veg, drink and smoke ( kicked off the last one long back)- no comments from anyone coz I DIDN'T TELL.
    Bottom line - Everyone eventually adapted. All the younger cousins are working. And, my family still loves me :)

    ReplyDelete
  11. Very true & fair! But you left somethings like clothes restriction; how women have to wear only sarees that too with pull on pallu on head, period,,, jeans, salwar Kurta are def no,no if the girl have to live in typical join family! And how the bride have to give service to ma in laws & please them by making 500 paparrrrrr a year. I also dislike how the family can be so greedy but then at the same time you can be blindly in love with their son who's the sweetest & nicest boyfriend/husband any women can have. I think the problem lies in this bloody entire family restriction & business! So be very carefully to all those good women out there before you fall in with one of these boys who comes from marduuuuuu background.
    The only hope you can have of your true love is wishing your marduuuuuu lover's (arrange marriage) to fall apart & you reunion with him after 50 years when none of this family business matter, & you can take full care of your sweetheart & be happily ever after without breaking or hurting any of your or his family sentiment!

    Lastly, Once you fall in love with them, they're hard to resist! Be careful ladies, his existence in your past life can affect or rune your present life as well. Just like the saying: "if god really wants to give painful punishment to any girls; he'll have to make her born & raise in wealthy family & have her married off to poor/ bekhariiiii family, she'll will automatically have slow & painful death!



    :-)

    ReplyDelete
  12. Thank you for the insightful post. And Tsomo85 -- very true indeed!

    ReplyDelete
  13. It was as if someone was telling me the story of my baradari or family! You sound too like a Punjabi :P

    ReplyDelete
  14. Studying well not to use it in anyway is a sad tale of many a indian families irrespective of which religion or culture you belong to. Is education an ornament to display? I wonder what is the use of such education when you are not allowed to work after marriage? Forget about work, at least you should use it in a proper way. What is the use of such marriage when you are not allowed to do what you like ? What is the use of such marriage when you have to become a caged bird? Marriage should become a platform to grow individually, to excel in whatever you are interested in, to grow as a human being and to bloom in all the fields. But of late, disgusting enough the meaning of the word marriage has been changed completely.

    ReplyDelete
  15. its really true i was about to marry a marwadi guy being from abroad i get shocked on the final stage when i met the family and see how woman are treated in this cast
    womand after mariage has no rights are like slaves and objects not allowed to work and go out no social life must wear saree only with pallu on head and serve the in laws doing household whole day and night and i understand love mariage is not in their habits only arranged suit to them
    its very sad that they have to follow the mould they cant take their own decisions without family consent its shocking in 2014 to see so conservative society exist in india !

    ReplyDelete
  16. I want this things to change as i am married recently in marwari family . I just want some siggestions on how this tradition can be changed which will help a lot of young women like me

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey! I don't think you can completely change traditions! A lot depends on the mentality of the family - how open they are to embrace being modern while keeping traditions.
      My family has changed over years - they had to grow forward but the basics still remain same. So its challenging..sometimes you accept things the way they are. And sometimes you rebel. Fight for your interests. fight for what you want to be and do. And if you are married your husband's support will matter a lot. My brothers supported their wives a lot & slowly things changed in the house. Earning respect is very important.

      Delete
  17. I want this things to change as i am married recently in marwari family . I just want some siggestions on how this tradition can be changed which will help a lot of young women like me

    ReplyDelete

You might want to say something
No !! Don't be Afraid !
Go ahead :P