Sunday, May 18, 2008

Rage : Part 2 : Read Ps2

0 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]

Since I've been talking of Rage & all that jazz , I thought I should pay some tribute to my ps2 , lol ! It didn't make any contribution in making me mad , but it certainly had quite a considerable amount of impact. BurntOuT , the most of all ! Its my fav & it really really made me aggressive! BurnOut is all about hitting the traffic , hitting & hitting more , smashing cars, truck or anything that moves on the road.You could bump into anything & everything , & you are still virtually alive with your car looking as fresh as it can.

The graphics are amazing & compared to some other games , I found that there was a better control of car than in others. It used to piss me off while playing some other car games , the car used to actually swing from one corner to another making it impossible to cross the stage.But this one's an exception & what could be better than hitting traffic , specially when you live in a city or country where anything & anyone can come under your car! Seriously , the traffic sense among people is so bad !

Anyway , lets come back to BurnOut. Whenever I play this game , & move out of my house to drive , I really feel like smashing cars. That's the impact of ps2 games.I feel like driving super fast & smashing anyone who comes in my way - & specially those driving w/o much traffic sense. I feel like flying low.Thankfully I never did really hit anyone ! No , I mean I have , but not after playing ps2 ! So haven't really got a chance to blame my very ps2 ! But I think if Rage Club doesn't come into existence , ps2 can be a replacement.

Huh , but anyway , there's something good for me - I'm a much cooler person now.Don't know how that change began & when , but I've been noticing myself & I know that I really have got some control over my anger. Thank God !! The very example of this is that now I don't feel like breaking furniture after having a tiff with mom. The case may be different , I'm a lil too habitual to her scoldings ..so may be its not affecting me anymore! It could be that or it could be what I said before , have had developed some control over anger. Its good anyway , whatever way it is ! But I don't think mom really thinks 'bout all this.Her only focus - my daughter did this..she didn't do that..she doesn;t listen to me ..she talks to me rudely..& so on , all negative for me! She focuses on these things & that's why she gets more of these quite often.Whereas I'm trying to get a lil logical w/o being emotionless , & just checking out for where I had been wrong.I look it at from her point of view too .

Sometimes she's right , Most of the time , I am ! > My version.

She's right all the time > her version !

There's the difference. OK , I'll say we both have a 50-50 deal of being right. So half the times , she is , & the other half time I'm ! better now. But mum never tries to analyze these things. She never gives a thought to her actions but the only thing on her mind is what all I did to her ! Mum's such a short-tempered person that she gives a complex to the word "short-temper" !! Anyway , I ain't complaining ..I'm pretty cool 'bout these things now because there seriously isn't time to waste time , cribbing bout things . I want to make more effective use of this short time , to celebrate & be happy for all that I have ! [ How did I really turn into such a saint ? lol . Actually its all thanks to a book I read a couple of days back ..The Secret - its amazing !! ]

And for The Rage Club..lol , I'm grinning :P ..well its just an imagination & there's something that I would like to add to it . Suggestion by a friend - to have a muddy pool ! Damn ! Why didn't that occur to me ?? lol . But hey my buddy , its a great idea. Specially because it involves lot of fun.When we'd chuck the person we are angry with into the muddy pool , I bet , we'll laugh rather than making an effort to kill him /her in mud , lol ! Messy !! I Like it !! :D And secondly to make a provision for cutting wires ! Now , I won't ask why that didn't occur to me , coz I don't know why that occurred to you ? lol ..what's the logic behind it ? I never did so , nor have I seen anyone doing it , but since you had an experience of it & that you enjoyed it , I shall not question anymore ! :P

Ok , My ps2 feels lonely now ..lemme take it for a ride ! *Traffic hitting*

Saturday, May 3, 2008

The Rage Club

2 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]
I'm getting aggressive day by day. Also the level of my temper is soaring high! I'm growing violent. Just the other day , I was shouting & yelling for apparently no good reason! And sometimes I'm like so hell confused as to why I did what I did ??! I ain't frustrated though.There's nothing going around that's making me sad either. But then , I'm mad @ lil things . I just turn so so damn angry even when it isn't something that should bother me ! But yeah , mum would scold me & then she would say something & behave in a way that really pisses me off. I feel like destroying everything I get my hands on! Breaking the mirror , glass , window. Throwing furniture etc. And since I cannot do any such thing , I usually have to find some other way to chuck my anger. So I burst out crying. Its weird though - to cry when you're not sad but only because you're angry. I guess it happens may be 'coz of the fact that things didn't happen my way. Or someone said something that I never wanted to hear. Or I myself behaved odd. I really am going mad mad mad ! I'm still unable to find out as to why I shouted so loudly so many times earlier ! And it just looks so silly. My mom too wonders what I'm really up to ?!

The last time I was mad , I wanted to write this post then & there at that moment itself. Nevertheless , I'm writing down now. So well as I said there has to be something to chuck away the anger out of oneself , I really thought of creating an anger club. And I got hot name for it - The Rage Club . It would be not just for me but for everyone who is angry & wants to do something violent to get over with the madness ! This club would be a chick one with some chick interiors & strong colors like red & black . People could just come in & break glasses - as many as they want ! There's some real fun in breaking glass . The way it cracks into several pieces , the way it shimmers after breaking , the sound created when it breaks !! It's soothing to mind because when you're mad, you really wish to crush something.You want to break away everything because you cannot break the bones of the person you're mad at ! And hey , I really like breaking glasses but I never intentionally broke any glass till now. Though now I have such plans , lol.
And the club would not be only to break glass. You could even break furniture. Destroy things by crushing them . And most of all , tear pages. Yes !! Have you ever noticed the fact that at any moment when you're angry & you have a book in your hand , you feel like tearing it apart. Like into bits & crushing it . And in fact , you just don't feel like taking such action - most of the time you end up doing so too ! Off course , I would never tear my Sherlock Holmes ' book . I pick up some waste paper instead .

So the Rage club isn't a violent thing in itself. It would be used to destroy things , yes , but that in turn would be done only to destroy your Rage ! And there's no regretting anyway , because when you've really joined this club ( when it comes into existence ) , it would be a justified rage or else why would ya become so violent ?? And yes , when the madness is due to some person , then we'll have a kind of effigy made of sponge so that you could punch it as much as you want! Lol , I wish this is made as soon as possible ! :P

OK , now . The above written part was typed few days ago.Right now I'm calm , cool & collected. But that doesn't mean I'm giving up my plans for the club :P . Actually I thought that the club could have two chambers.One off course , the Rage Chamber & the second one would be the Freeze Chamber.After all the violence in Rage Club , one could swiftly move into Freeze Hour ( that's the name I give to the 2nd chamber ) It would be a place with soft calm interiors in blue & purple , soothing colors ...one could just relax with a cuppa cold coffee or any of those drinks except liquor . With the music playing & a dance floor , you could dance the night away ! This place is to chill out ! A pub as it could be called. I always wanted to have my own chain of pubs ,lol. And this thing goes just next after the Rage Chamber .
Lol , I must be mad to be having dreams of creating anything like a Rage Club , but I do want to. If not for people , at least for myself. I wish I was provided some more space in my new home , I would have made the same thing there itself :P
But till then , I've found a new way to crush my anger. Splashing some cold water , & then moving an ice cube all over my face ( It feels great !!! ) And then , listening to my fav tracks.

Someone once told me that anger is a wasted emotion.It might be. But for people like me who are born-short-tempered , there's no point debating if I should have been mad or not.It happens spontaneously , given to the fact , an unstable mind . So instead of taking any dangerous action in anger or even saying anything that could be disastrous , its better to find ways to chuck anger so that we do not have to regret over the actions taken in a fit-of-rage.

I'm game , my Rage Club !