Wednesday, July 3, 2019

Central Park NYC

2 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]
I've been through soooo much shit in the past 2 or 3 years ..that I have no idea what I've become. Maybe little less human. :\
Ok weird.

But now I challenge you to stone my head ( metaphorically ofcourse) - and I won't tether. No reaction.  kuch nahi hoga mujhe . It wouldn't matter to me.
Because I've seen worse.😅

'Things happen for good'. 

I wish to raise questions on this.

Is it good if it makes you stone hearted ?
Is it good if it robs you off of any little emotions that you had kept away from getting bruised ?
It is good if it brain fogs your very being ?

How good really?

But we don't have a reverse gear , do we ? Not to change things that have reached to this conclusion  , instead not having to deal with them in the first place altogether.

All I can eventually take with are lessons (which would serve what great purpose - am still unaware of! ) Lessons which cost me an arm & a leg. A roller coaster of every fiber of my emotion.

I pledged to value myself. To love myself. However, its fizzling out in this frenzy of what seems to be an everlasting loop of keeping hopes on a tenterhook.
And yet I try.
We all want to see that silver lining , innit ? Even if it means we might just have to hallucinate it - just for namesake!

In all of this chaos - which I deliberately refrained from penning down , there's ofcourse something GOOD I'd like to keep on these pages.

Its this wonderful ethereal place. This surreal moment.
 Bathseda Central Park NYC. 

You never know fountains are such a beauty untill you see this one!

Thank you for this.

P.S. : I'm filmy! 

Monday, July 10, 2017

3 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]
Its tough to hold on to memories.

 People - we can let go , in time..when the dust settles.

But memories ?

They're  a bunch of beautifully painful ( or painfully beautiful ? ) moments you capture in your heart saving them like a souvenir , gradually unknowingly letting them turn into beasts & drum into your emptiness.

Sunday, February 15, 2015

4 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]
* Just because you idolise someone or look upto them ..doesn't mean you have to approve or agree  with them on everything.
 They can be WRONG too.

* Secrets are best remained secrets with yourself.
They are your worst weakness.
 My biggest lesson has been that NO MATTER how close you are to someone - never share something that can be backfired at you.
People irrespective of their importance to you ..are always waiting for an opportunity.

* It isn't always the best thing to call a spade a spade. Or atleast not the best time.
Immediate reactions can be lethal.

* Everything is good from a distance. Even friendships.

* Yes , you just have to learn to ignore few things in life that are  running around you. Because you cannot do anything about them.Even when it hurts..even when it bothers.
Don't take it to heart. Wear it off.

* Smile. Talk. Smile. Talk less but smile.

Wednesday, December 3, 2014


3 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]
The thing is sometimes some energies / feelings are so wasted - you cannot make pickle out of them.
( In my mother tongue I say - Ye feeling ka acchar dalu kya ?? :p )

So we wait for some things to end. Anticipating pain does not lessen it though.

Then there's always that emptiness.

So when a person comes back into your life after a long time with all the apology drama and all - and you let them in. Its a disaster in disguise.

Forgiveness is a tool we use to make peace with ourselves.

But giving another chance knowingly running into the blind.

It feels like its not worth having those feelings.
You cannot contain them with you.

And therefore some memories should remain where they are.
 Tweaking them  can only create problems again.

Why open old wounds ?

There is no point in holding back to moments you once let go.

Wednesday, October 29, 2014

Shades of grey ?

1 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]

Is it true ? Is there something beyond black & white ?

Can all things , people , feelings be categorized into two extreme ends ? Or does everything has its shades of grey ?

Ambiguous or amalgamation of good and bad ..conflicting  yet together yin & yang ?

Is that how all exists ? No black or white but only in grey ?

Friday, September 26, 2014

Wiser ?

0 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]
Wisdom is being able to dissect your feelings from a situation.

In some cases , wisdom is not letting emotions run too high on decisions.
 Some things are wrong because they're wrong. Feelings cannot make them right.

Wisdom is adapting to change ( something I miserably fail at! )

Wisdom is finding new ways than beating around the bush on a load of old crap.

Wisdom is in developing enough power to break bonds that cannot coexist.

Luck supports in extreme cases.
But at all other times. .its wisdom that you need the most!

Wisdom isn't all about making the right decision. Its about making one at the right time!

Sunday, September 14, 2014

0 Cuppa coffeee [comments ]
We all have demons inside us that are waiting to unlock themselves.
Demons that we are terrified of unhooking.

We wish to throw 'em out yet we wldnt confront them.

We battle them on everyday basis. Battles that are un ending. Battles that one day give us strength and vigor to fight it all and battles that weakens us the very next day.

The fear is so strong.  The fear of not just facing it but the fear of utter  helplessness.
What if the demons never vanish ?

Our choices make us our habit. We are our habits. And habits are so darned difficult to change.
Because any changes to usual pattern is temporary.  
You flip back to your old self conveniently.

Demons are convenient to fight from where they are. Cry over it. Blame it. Run away from it. But it follows you like dark shadow.

The only way out is to destroy it completely.
How is the only question I seek answer for !