Wednesday, April 13, 2011


You were alone. You are alone. And you will be alone.

Learn to walk alone.

Been given that piece of advice long back. It has only started to sink in my head now when I'm going through intense swapping behavioral , mood and personality changes.

Now when I'm so indifferent , so rugged , so tired ...that all I wish is to go away and really for alone.

At this point. I could trade anything.'Coz I have nothing to loose but only a cloak of these inflexible thoughts overlapping my true self.

I've lost it. Any leftover enthusiasm that there was.
Battling against and for god knows how many voices inside me.

I miss being me.Specially a part of me...that  made efforts to comply with her wants.
Who never refused taking calls..chatting..texting friends... shopping....watching movies.
Who liked disturbing closed ones.
Who now..doesn't talk much. Doesn't feel like talking much.Doesn't grumble. Doesn't want to grumble.
Instead has made herself excessively rude.
Whose friends & parents are not too happy with these fresh undesirable traits.

Someone truly read me right - I've lost the child in me.
And strangely I don't even have an urge to go back to being what I was.
I don't  feel like praying heartily. I only sit in front of the idols staring at them for some sensible explanation. For enlightenment.For magic.

I'm THAT passive.


  1. heyyyyy..whts the matter?
    cheeeer up..

    strange/severe/prolonged bouts of mood swings i guess- it happens to the best of us...


  2. Please try to find the child in you, its not worth losing..

    In the future when you look back you should not feel that you missed out on precious moments of life

    Make the best of what you have now and things will automatically fall in place...

  3. Get yourself busy...
    and everything else will be out of your mind in a jiffy...
    hang out alone for some time, check out the weirdest movies and sweat it out... youll feel fresh!!!

  4. hi..just landed here from Ria..and really liked the is something i was penning my thoughts on this afternoon too!
    somewhere in this and that, here and there and in all we have to do and be...we lose we:-)

  5. Hope u r doing well dear....take care. Wish u all the luck n happiness.

  6. well, everyone goes through this phase, in my blog too, u can find posts related to this.
    all I can tell you is, you will be fine :) just dont lose hopes!

  7. Okay, as opposed to the sunshine and rainbowesque comments above, I actually believe this doesn't pass. You'll be feel better, definitely, but you'll always yearn for the child in you as you grow.
    Thats why booze is for adults only :D

  8. ♥I love your blog so much.)) ♥

  9. This is a philosophy that can be traced back to the Vedas as well.I think that we need to see a larger picture with more objectivity while assessing what you are going through within.

    I liked the way you have written it. It comes straight from the heart.


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