Silly spoilt time.

When I calculate the amount of time I spend on my emotional analysis , on silly things..I feel guilty of the time I lost that could be efficiently utilized ( -- two words you can start off writing any goddamn management paper :P ) to finish off my long due list of movies to be seen.

I'm currently  in a  very different mode that I'm not disliking. Not thinking much , just going with the flow. 

Not that I've never been spontaneous..but you know that thing in every girl's DNA - the entire process of analyzing , over stating , getting hyper  or whatever.. it sucks now!
I find myself stressed and upset when I think so much about things that will eventually fizzle out.

I'm not the kind of person who makes many resolutions.
But once I do  , I bloody keep my words.
Every time I'm deviated , my system starts buzzing : wrong lane!

When  dad asks me what do I want and I say nothing , he asks me again if I'm sure and whether I've made up my mind to never get anything from him.

I don't answer.
Although I'm aware there is still a long long time till I keep piling up the favors and debt. ..but why increase it unnecessarily ?
Once you enter the 20 league..every single penny spent on you by your parents gives a feeling of debt.Only difference , you've made no promise to return back in monetary terms. Obviously the debt is far greater to fill in with money.
But the point is - it starts pinching you.
Its a good thing I'm a miser. Sometimes I'm very proud of that characteristic :P

When I had a free choice to do what I want to do ( with hidden conditions and clauses ) - I got stuck up with my last plan. My backup rather.

There are times when I start wondering what the hell have I done. But then I remember what dad had said " you're grown up. Make your own decisions and take responsibility for them"

I must admit I felt quite insecure that day. Because decisions no matter whether I made or not - responsibility - I always thought someone else was taking care of.

But anyhow , I keep telling myself -

made a choice. 

Now stick to it!!

Shocking.

In the most horrifying incidents to have happened in the city , a 10 yr old kid was kidnapped for a ransom of Rs. 2 crore 3 days back.

He was abducted by the neighbour!! - a 20 something ruthless bastard wanting easy money to make up for his gambling loss.

The police had taken him into custody after reports of the kid being last seen with him. After 3 days , he confessed to having killed the innocent child.
The fucking loser made only one call after kidnapping.
The police was immediately informed and so was the media. Posters of the lost boy were put across the city.
Probably fearing that he might get caught - the bastard killed the kid within few hours after abudcting him. His body was dumped in a water tanker of an under-construction building , only 2 kms from his house.

The kid went to the same school as my brother. He stayed only a few meters away from our house.

can you imagine the plight of the parents of the little boy ? It breaks my heart every time I see a picture of his in the newspaper or at the traffic signals. He was such a sweet looking kid.

It is an unimaginable and awfully disturbing incident. The city is gripped with shock waves.

How can someone fall so low to MURDER A CHILD ??

The asshole could have gotten the money and left the innocent soul.

And can you believe it that a neighbor did such an heinous crime ?

The murderer's father expired today afternoon after heart stroke.
Their house was pelted with stones since morning.

The killer must be burnt alive. What a horrendous crime!

my heart goes out to the family of the child.
God give them strength!

jinx ?

Is it common that things you are most excited about...most lovingly desperate about and badly want never really happen ?
Or delayed ?
Or just go kaput at the 11th hr ?

Its almost routine for me. Therefore ,  I make an effort in toning down that excitement and not think much about the 'plan'. .in some hope that maybe it does work out if I don't wish for it so madly!

Its a futile effort though...because you so badly want it to happen that you can't take your mind off it.

And once you start  re-thinking it ...you lock yourself into the loop of wanting it bad again!

Tough nut to crack.

iLoss iRespect

A tribute to the greatest innovator ...to the man who gave us most beautiful & amazing gadgets..

To the man who revolutionized the tech world...who isn't any more.
It still hasn't sunk in

"Remembering that I'll be dead soon is the most important tool I've ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything -- all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure -- these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart."

"Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma -- which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice."

RIP Steve Jobs!


Thank you for Apple.

Timing.

I have a gut feeling that unless I learn to buy a gadget all by myself - it is not going to survive!

So I broke the touch screen of my x6 , again :P

Which stupid person on earth does garba while keeping the cell phone in one hand and clapping over it ? :P

I did :|

I had a great tiring dancing weekend. And I was obviously turned off for killing my cell phone.

Most of my friends and cousins think that I've become very self absorbed. I don't involve much in talks. I don't respond well. And the truth is I know that. But I'm not willing to do anything about it.

I'm very irritated and I don't have any specific reason for the same.And I'm not sorry for my behavior.

I want people to stop talking to me if they have issues with me.I cannot entertain complaints for now
because I'll be my old self again in some time.
I don't have the energy to explain. My mind's already quite screwed up.

Anyway..coming back to Garba..this time it was quite a disappointment. The crowd wasn't as rocking. The arrangements were annoying.

Its so weird and ironic. The things you always wanted to be a part of..you never could because there were restrictions.
And now when you have the freedom...you are not THAT inclined towards it.

Everything has a timing.

If you didn't make it then..you might as well do someday..
but
odds are..it will loose its charm.