Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Walk the talk.

Something , and infact I'd say a lot has metamorphosed in me in the past few days.
 I feel responsible with a guilt riding over my head making me cringe.
But the difference is that I want to take and act on that responsiblity.

Now that this sapience has conceded , am desperate to makeup for the loss of the past years of what I would name as the prolonged teenage f**khead 'me' phase!

Its as if I'm only a couple of mins late on the platform when the train I had to board on - has already departed.
I will have to run. Sweat a little. And then I'll catch it. I'll do.

But its scary to think what if am unable to catchup ?
 It makes me groan out aloud. The thought makes me weep inside , for all we know - I'd take the blame over me.

Its time to take charge of everything. Its time to get onto this track. I have to and I want to make things allright. I want to take care of my family.
They are all that matters right now.

Yes , it was about me. Everything has always been about ME. Whether or not I was happy? Whether or not I was fulfilling my dreams ?  Whether I was not getting what I wanted ? Me. Me. Me!
But I forgot there was so much more to me , of me & about me.

My thoughts. I am working on my thoughts.
I'm putting efforts to heal my body mentally , spiritually and emotionally. It will take weeks , months... but I'm determined not to let anything make me slip from here.

Health has been on my list for quite a long time. The problem with me is that all my pursuance fails at a point. So I HAVE to be persistent. I can't afford any other option this time.
 I'm pursuing fitness. Giving myself Ayurvedic tonics and doing yoga and cardio.
I am expecting and aiming for a radical change in myself by November. This Diwali I'm gonna give  this wonderful gift 'fitness' which I have denied myself intermittently.

It feels good when you try to take things in your stride. When you are at least being honest to yourself. I've already wasted so much time and I'm not allowing that to undermine my enthusiasm.

Nike's mantra is for everyone - Just do it!

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